Don't giggle when I say "crotch"

This is my new favorite poem.

For creatures your size I offer
A free choice of habitat
so settle yourselves in the zone
that suits you best, in the pools
of my pores or the tropical
forests of arm-pit and crotch,
in the deserts of my forearms,
or in the cool woods of my scalp.

Build colonies: I will supply
adequate warmth and moisture,
the sebum and lipids you need,
on condition you never
do annoy me with your presence,
but behave as good guests should,
not rioting into acne
or athlete's foot or a boil.

-from "A New Year's Greeting" by W.H. Auden

I thnk I didn't lay down serious enough rules with my microorgansms. Hey guys, we need to talk.